Why selling it is easier.

So… I have a couple of profiles on some dating sites around the place.

One of them is my happy-clappy ‘Hey! This is me! Here’s some fun stuff, here’s all the pictures of me doing things’ and the other is ‘Hello, I’m just looking for fun. NSA, no drama, no games. Here’s my mysterious brooding picture’

And I can’t win with either of them. In fact, my slut profile has just raised such hell from one guy, it’s actually just given me a headache.

His first email went on at length to say how he’s easy going, take it as he leaves it, not bothered. Asked my name and location.

I replied, saying that’s good, and what I’m looking for, because most of the men on here have been a bit mental

Him – Well, with a profile like that you’re inviting the mentals in.

Me – *Blink* Hang on, did I just read that right? Sooo… by me saying I’m not after a relationship, I’M the one inviting the men to become crazy, I’M the one whose made them have pictures and profiles that make them look like a serial killer? I’M the one inviting them?

HIM – So what’s your name. I’m from londonplace, you?

ME -DO YOU NOT SEE ANYTHING WRONG WITH WHAT YOU JUST SAID?!

HIM – FFS! If you’re not going to tell me you’re name and where you’re from, and have a profile saying you’re looking for something casual, then you’re obviously a man.

Yes. I’m a man. I make a feminism stand point and pretend to be a 17 stone BBW because I’m a man.

And my other profile does no better.

‘Hey, U hav greet eye. i lik ur profile’

‘bbe, u n me’

‘U look so sexy do u now that?’

‘Hi, what’s up. I like your profile. Fancy a chat?’

‘Thanks, what did you like about it?’ Que endless silence.

‘Hey, I like your profile. But your humour is quite intimidating’

What does that even meeeeaaaan?!

‘Hey, I like your profile, but I’m not after anything serious.’

Well, I’d show you my other one, but you’d think I was a dude. Or you’d turn crazy at the mere sight of a woman wanting to express her sexual freedom!

Image

Come one, come all! Hide your eyes, cover your babes lest the sight of her drive you to the nut house!

Woman, like you’ve never seen here before – wanting sex without a relationship!

She’ll drive you wild and make you forget how to use both vowels AND consonants!

You’ll never be the same, from now on you’ll only communicate through BBM. Like a 14 year old without any credit!

 

Enough! You cry.. get off the dating sites!

And I do! Honestly, I’m not on them all the time. I just dive in every 6 months or so to remind myself of what I’m missing out on. Not. Fucking. Much.

I rely much more on real life. But when a boy approaches me in real life, there is way too much room for manoeuvre. And when I say ‘room for manoeuvre’, I mean ‘wine with the possibility of throwing up in my shoe’.

 

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2 Responses to “Why selling it is easier.”

  1. Why selling it is easier. | Sex Worker Blogs Says:

    […] By Miss M […]

  2. Why selling it is easier. | Sexworker Blogs Says:

    […] Why selling it is easier. […]

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