That’s not my name.

Gosh. Been awake for an hour now, and the first half of it was lovely. It was filled with giggles, and hugs, and kisses, and even a special appearance by Wedge Antillies.

And I thought crikey, what a wonderful start to the day! Surely nothing can ruin it when I’ve had such a lovely start.

I even thought of turning my phone off, just so I can enjoy it a little bit more. But  as the consummate professional that I am, I duly answered my phone when it gave it’s first ring of the morning.


‘Hi Babes!’

Gargh!! Urgh. And there it is, I’m bummed.

Babes, Baby, Darling, Sweetheart, Sexy, Honey. All of them sound like overly intimate nails being scraped down the blackboard of my spine. My name is Melody, or Mel. I do not know you, no matter how many hours you’ve spent spuffing yourself over my pictures. Therefore, I am not your Babes, Baby, Darling, Sweetheart, Sexy,  or even Honey.

Some girls don’t kiss. Some girls don’t orgasm. Some girls don’t do cunnilingus. I will happily do all of these things, but I will also punch you on the nose if a pet name squeaks out of your mouth, even just a little bit.


30 Day Song Challenge.

Day 3 – A song that makes you Happy.

The dickhead song! Purely because it makes me so happy to know that I am not the only one who thinks the Nathan Barley types who wear bowler hats and glasses with no frames and sit in the Audience of ‘OMG with Peaches Geldof’ are...well…dickheads. Lets shoot them! 🙂


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2 Responses to “That’s not my name.”

  1. 30 Day Song Challenge « Coin-Operated Girl Says:

    […] 01 – Your favorite song Day 02 – Your least favorite song Day 03 – A song that makes you happy Day 04 – A song that makes you sad Day 05 – A song that reminds you of someone Day 06 – A […]

  2. AllanHardie Says:

    “Familiarity breeds contempt.”; ne’er truer words were spoken.

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