Hints & Tips for aspiring Ho’s & Pro’s

I get quite a lot of referrals and emails from young lady’s wanting to take up the Pro-business. I’m sure I must have said it, but I’m sorry gals, I can’t help you.

I just feel a little uncomfortable being responsible for someone I don’t know – both when it comes to the gents, and the ladies. What if I’m called to give a reference for a client, or the lady I might have ‘under my wing’, and either one turns out to be a mentalist?

I’m happy to help friends of mine who I’ve known if they want to try, but not strangers. I fear too much for their physical and mental well-being, both before, after, and during their time escorting. There are lovely people out there willing to help, but if you don’t have the sense or patience to read something like the SAAFE website, page to page, inch after inch,  then you’re definitely starting off on the wrong foot. Especially if you skip to the forums just to get a quick answer to something that’s been explained time and again. seriously, it’s a great resource, it’s won awards and everything.

However, there are some things that I’ve learnt which are just too useful to let slide. Of course, all opinions are strictly those of the auther and do not reflect any other prossies, other than myself 🙂 So don’t have a moan when someone thinks you’re doing it wrong..

So, let’s dip a tender foot into the warm waters of professional sex work, with the bedroom.

Important things to have:

*A bed.

Obvious, I know. But I’ve seen one or two reports where someone is trying to operate out of their lounge, and think the sofa bed they got from their aunt in 1982 – when sofa beds were still considered a trendy idea – will do. It wont. Get a bed.


Always best to have several sets. You never know what one might spill on them in any given day.


Don’t skimp. Go to John lewis and get nice fluffy ones that wont turn into cardboard the moment you wash them. You can use the cardboard ones to put on the bed – especially if the baby oils out, or anal play is on the cards. Gross, yes – but lots of fun! Don’t have them on the bed all the time, if you want to protect you’re duvet, use bedspreads. There’s nothing worse than seeing your ‘play’ area reduced to the size of a scratchy towel!

*Shower Gel

Get lots, use all the glorious options available to you! There’s stuff for him, for you, and for your undercarriages PH balence. Get reviving gel, neutral gel, gel that has no fragrance, and gel that has lots. You don’t know where your visitor is off to next – he might not want to smell of Fresh Shower, or he might want to smell like he just came from the gym.

*A clock

Don’t rely on your phone. Picking that up every 5 minutes is ridonkalous. Get a nice big one so every one knows where they stand.

*A radio

Can’t live without mine, it drowns out the tick from the clock for a start! Digital radios are great – no interference, and plenty of stations on offer that wont blast you with adverts or love songs every 5 minutes. I’ve always said there’s nothing worse than getting into the throes of dirty passion and some soppy lurrrve song comes on.

*Key working items & container.

Just in case you need it spelt out, do not go anywhere without – condoms, tissues, baby wipes, lubricant and baby oil. I’ve got mine in a handy box, so that just in case an unexpected visitor pops round, I can slam the lid shut and hide all evidence.

* A heater

In case it’s cold.

*A fan

In case it’s hot. Though not much chance of that..

Those are pretty much the basics. Of course, you can add as much stuff as you want. As time’s gone on, I’ve slowly migrated half of my belongings to my working flat. But then, I like a nice homely feel, and it’s good to have comforts at hand. Plus I’m in this weird position in my life where I appear to have 2 of everything, and am only too happy to find a space and fill it.

There’s more, of course there’s always more you can have. But right now I have to dash off and try and restock some stuff. (It’s one of those fun times when I’m in the middle of Sainsbury’s, surrounded by shouty mothers and screaming baby’s whilst desperately filling my basket with as much half price baby oil and wet wipes that my filthy hands can carry…always bring a smile to my face!)



2 Responses to “Hints & Tips for aspiring Ho’s & Pro’s”

  1. Sameah Says:

    Wonderful article! I wanted to ask, as a women interested in entering the biz, can I do our-calls only? I’m VERY weary of clients knowing where I live, but can’t currently afford and second apartment w/ all the trimmings. Thanks for your info!

    • Miss M Says:

      Oooh, tricky.

      It depends on how much you want/need to make. I did outcalls only to start with, but had very little in the way of overheads. I couldn’t live my lifestyle now without doing incalls. In this boz, you have to spoeculate to accumulate..;)

      See if you can get a flatshare, or use one one day a week on a weekly basis. Otherwise you can always book hotels in advance. But it’s a gamble.

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