We’re all going on a summer holiday…

Why haven’t I posted? Why have I got a message saying I wont be available until Sunday? Has my world fallen apart…again?  Fear not – all will be explained..

I’ve been playing Spinster Aunt to a 6 year old, and have been dragged to every corner of a very wet London Zoo, the Science Museum, and the Nataural History museum. I’ve had to explain why a robotic T-rex will not burst out of the museum and eat us all in our sleep, and the difference between saying ‘My Auntie pulled my hair’ and ‘My Auntie pulled my hair accidentally.’ There’s also been several lessons in the economy*, History** and Religious Education*** . Fortunately, it meant I could go and be a proper tourist and see Toy Story 3 at the cinema, do a duck tour, and explore Hamleys for a good reason!

Such toil. But it should hopefully help to explain why I’m postponing doing very much until my brain and body have caught up with each other, and the child is back in the slave labour camp where she belongs.

So I’m afraid Melody can’t answer your call at the moment, but please remember, your call is important to Melody. Please continue to hold and Melody will endeavour to answer your call as soon as possible.

But in the meantime, feet lovers should be lining up to sort out my poor tootsies from Monday onwards!

*’You have £5 to spend in the gift shop. The plastic dinosaur –amazingly – costs £10. Therefore, you cannot have said dinosaur. But you can have this amazingly crappy rubber!’

**’No, Oliver Cromwell is not the same one as the boy in the musical.’

***’Yes, I’m sorry mummy said your elderly cat, the mental rabbit, and all your diseased fish had come to London with me, but as they’re obviously not here,  so I think we need to have a little talk…’

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